Maths teacher Mr Worth (nicknamed 'The Goat' as a result of his ridiculous 'beard but no moustache' facial hair) once enjoyed giving the class a severe bollocking so much that he appeared to develop a *very small* erection. This inevitably led us to the conclusion that The Goat's Plod was a gigantic worm like creature that would chase fourth formers around the quad. Fortunately the Plod could only move at a slow speed so if you stayed on your guard it was usually possible to avoid it until some other poor fellow became the object of its attentions. And how do you notify one of your peers that the Plod has set its sights on them? With this simple exchange: "It's after you." "What is?" "The Goat's Plod." The colour naturally drains from the victim's face, and they immediately become hyper-sensitive to peripheral noise and motion. And who could blame them -- not many boys would enjoy being buggered by a maths teacher's gigantic rogue penis.