An ollie, as everyone who's ever played Tony Hawks will know, is like when you jump, but with a skateboard on.
Aged thirteen, we would practice our ollies for hours on end. When any of us got so much as an inch off the ground, we could all get seriously amazed.
During one afternoon of such cripple-hopping, we heard the roll and clatter of a familiar crap half-ollie, followed by a loud and insincere exclamation of "whoops!".
Apparently, while we were looking the other way, Alan had accidentally ollied over his dad's car.
Now, the thing that made this especially amazing, was Alan's ongoing persistence that the trick was not in his mind. This went on for months, despite constant jeering and a failure to repeat the trick because when people were looking, it "put him off".
These lies climaxed with an audacious lie-reversal, where he shouted at everyone that he'd never said that he had accidentally ollied over his father's car, and that he hadn't maintained the opposite for the last four months at all.
Ask him today, and he still denies he ever said it, which totally proves my point.