I am the man from del monte

There was a kid we went to school with called tony and he was heavily into w**nking and could not wait to get with a young lady. We told him that if you made a hole in a peice of fruit and stuck his tadger in there, it will feel just like the real thing.

So there we are sitting in his lounge when he comes steaming in with a orange between his legs, on his old boy, twisting it like a human juicer.

Can't believe he did it..................we called him the man from del monte ever since!!

Terry Lee, Chelmsford Essex