David Smart's sister
I forget her name, but she would have been quite attractive if
(a) She didn't bear a disturbing family resemblance to David.
(b) She didn't constantly stink of cat piss.
written by Pe*e Smi*h, approved by Phil

Tom Danby's sister looked more like a boy than he did. That's saying something when you consider that Danby looked like a big chimp with a stress vein on its forehead, stuffed into a school uniform.
written by Go*ty G*tty, approved by Ponky