i can't breathe Sadistic ritual in which a victim was selected, immobilized, and had his airways blocked until he went blue and his body lapsed into involuntary spasms. The frequency of these rituals is increased when a teacher informs the school in assembly that it could cause brain damage.

human torch When about 14 or 15, a handful of us grabbed this fat kid Peter Wall, pinned him down and poured lighter fluid all over him. We then proceeded to light matches over him and blow them out at the last minute. And throw lighters at him. And let him run for a bit, but because he was slightly over weight we could always catch him again. It wasn't really lighter fluid, it was just water, but we all got a letter off the head teacher saying Peter was afraid for his life. Tchch.

the typewriter Large kid pins down smaller kid and, in particular, pins the small kid's arms to the floor with his knees. Once in place the large kid stabs brutally on the chest of the small kid with his index fingers, as though "typing". Ever so often the larger kid could be heard to shout 'ting', and then slap the side of the prostrate kid's head as hard as he could (to mimic the old school lever-slap and carriage return).

the box The area at the end of a wooden prefab classroom which housed the electricity meters, about four feet square and three feet deep with wooden slated doors. At lunchtimes a small child was locked inside the box by sliding a stick through the handles. Afterwards, the stick was stored inside the box for later use. Several dozen 'classmates' would then spit through the gaps in the wooden slats. Attempts to get out of the box were akin to an enraged bear trying to get out of a cage, and most victims were generally reduced to tears after about 10 minutes. Some adopted a policy of no resistance but this largely resulted in them spending the rest of the lunch hour in there and emerging at the end, sometimes literally dripping with saliva. Particularly unpleasant during the winter months when colds were prevalent. see also kiddy in the middle

Nasal Daisy Chain. An actually-quite-cute-sort-of torture. When we were about 10 our group of friends took to the summertime habit of chasing our friend (a very good friend actually, why did we do it?) John Caulfield round the school field. Once pinned down we would stick a lot of daisies up his nose and in his ears, seeing if we could get more in than last time.
Sorry John.

Salt'n'Shake Crisps. The victim would be held down and forced to admit they were gay. Whatever the response, the little sachet of salt would be emptied into their mouth. Quite right too.

At first glance, this might seem a less painful act of torture than the other entries for this subject. However, if one considers the pain experienced by regular recipients of this punishment in later years, due to heart attacks, strokes, osteroperosis, gastric cancer and other ailments brought on by an excessive salt intake, it can be seen to be particularly vindictive, cruel and cleverly planned with an eye for the long haul.

James McNair knew he could go blind if he attempted to wipe off the Vicks Vapor Rub that we had applied generously undeneath his eyes. So we watched him suffer the 45 minute bus ride home, drowning in his own tears.
James immediately sought medical attention, however and the local GP saved the day with a wet cloth.
Never rub Vicks in people's eyes. Always read the label.

Petrol pumping was a particularly vicious act which involved pinning a child down, kneeling on their bicep and pumping their forearm up and down. This caused the bicep to move around under the knee grinding it into a pulp that would throb and remain utterly useless for about two days. Occasionally a double petrol pumping took place which left the victim flailing on the floor unable to use their arms to pick themself up.