julian
Ripe abuse-fodder Julian was unfailingly clean and tidy, spoke respectfully to teachers, did his homework on time, passed his exams, and practiced playing the cello in his lunchbreaks. By the age of 14, he was also a Karate expert.
Julian became a cult hero to the rest of the geeks, as inevitable attempts by the school bullies to disrupt his cello practice were met with near-lethal force.
Legend has it that Bruce Lee was captain of the school chess team. Chuck Norris often voluntered to stay behind after lessons and clean the blackboard properly with a wet cloth. - Ponky

written by To* Brow*, approved by Ponky

Our very own bully magnet was Roland Price, who had blue-white skin, weirdly red lips and took private ballet lessons. Playground beatings were a regular event, until the day Roland took the bull by the horns and performed a classical ballet routine in front of the entire school at morning assembly.
The unanimous respect that followed him thereafter could perhaps be put down to his astonishing gall, or possibly to the fact that performing in tights revealed Roland as the possessor of an impressively large dong.
written by an*nymou* u*er, approved by Ponky