Rather than play such mainstream games at lunch such as football, my friends and I used to save our cash for the lunchtime game of Milkshake Fights. Standing at either end of the playground, teams would lob strawberry and chocolate milkshake cartons at each other with the hope of getting someone else's shoes messy.

I once hit a hard kid by accident, but escaped a beating by saying that my brother was as hard as nails. I suspect that the fact this ploy worked says more about Ryan Peters pussydom than it does about my brother.

Two teams, one playground/car park. One (unopened) can of coke. The can is thrown back and forth, and must keep moving until it's empty. Sometimes it's a little pinhole fracture that forces the liquid out like a fire hose, sometimes it's a catastrophic-failure explosion. Or if you're very lucky, it's Simon Jarvis ending up concussed, blood running down his face, while a fit-to-burst yet still unopen can rolls gently down the kerb.