Report for Pete Smith
Approved stories4
Pending stories2
Rejected stories (hidden) 16
Deleted stories (hidden) 3
SummaryMean Boy

The standard, boring sandwich found in an average school packed lunch could be converted into a spectacularly crunchy culinary delight by the deceptively simple act of adding a layer of crisps between the bread and filling. I cannot remember a single instance of anyone not doing this at my infant/junior school.

I recently started doing this again after a break of around twenty years and am at a loss to understand why I ever stopped.

Favourite television programme of Mark Foster, who would constantly ask me if I'd seen the most recent episode and then look at me in disbelief when I told him I'd never heard of it. It was about a year before I realised he was talking about "The Fall Guy" which, of course, I watched all the time.

(At the time Mark was receiving regular speech therapy)

More commonly known as a 'setsquare', this pretentiously named weapon could do untold damage to the neck, thanks to its three mighty blades, or corners.

Plastic figures and spaceships which you played with in the late 70s, sold in the early 80s for a pittance and are now worth an absolute bloody fortune

Cockfingers says...gosh, didn't know that. What an informative chap.



Susan says... It's not BAD, per se, it's just a bit "here be bullshits". Surely no school could have an equal amount of smart, thick, slightly thick etc. kids? I don't buy it

Susan says...

Despite being a comprehensive, my junior school operated a startlingly overt segregation regime, in which every pupil was assigned to one of four groups according to their academic ability.

Kids in blue group were clever, those in green group were average, red group was for thickies and yellow group - well, these were the kids who couldn't spell their own name.

Movement between groups was rare, though this didn't stop the (ironically named) David Smart moving from blue to green to red in the space of a term, presumably as the teachers became incrementally aware of his stupidity.

(Actually, come to think of it, David wasn't all that thick - but he *did* stink of cat piss)


I forget her name, but she would have been quite attractive if
(a) She didn't bear a disturbing family resemblance to David.
(b) She didn't constantly stink of cat piss.