If you're going to throw a paper aeroplane at the French teacher, you might as well make a trip to the art room before the lesson and do it properly.

The school's entire collection of colour plates from old National Geographic magazines was decimated in a single term when we discovered they made superb paper aeroplanes, especially when they have cocktail sticks wedged into the nose.

Our school had pull-back partition walls separating some rooms. When we were upstairs in French, we used to throw planes down at a class diagonally below us. Their teacher usually went bananas at us but one day as a plane was slowly wafting down towards her, she looked up sharply and her left breast fell out of her dress. She didn't notice. Her entire class did. She ended up having a nervous breakdown.

Even better, if you blue tack one of those plastic craft knives into the fold down the centre of the aeroplane, so that the blade protrudes from the front of the aircraft, it becomes a highly accurate and lethal weapon of terror that will easily lodge into walls, blackboards, flesh etc.

Please don't try this at home, school or anywhere else.

(Unless you think it would be really funny, of course -Susan.)

Mr Anstey - mild-mannered R.E. teacher faced an up-hill struggle every week. Nobody really cared about "what kind of lentils Muslins had for breakfast". What they were interested in was having the man endure squadrons of paper planes pelting his back, while he chalked up The Ten Commandments.

Mr Anstey: "Right. Pieces of paper are now 10p each!"
Class clown, after throwing a £1 coin at teacher and strolling up to grab a pile of paper: "OK. I'll take ten."
You see, on God & stuff he was mustard. Forecasting current trends in market forces, though - rubbish.

Oh if only.

I chucked a plane at the headteacher in assemberly. I was excuted permental.

The colour plates from old National Geographic magazines (lovingly collected by our geography teacher over 20 years, decimated by us in the space of one term) make excellent paper aeroplanes, especially with a cocktail stick wedged into the nose.

Nah, we used to rip posters off the wall in our german lessons and lob them at the teacher. Once we made them into planes, obviously.

this entry has nothing to do with A0 paper aeroplane, but I can't make that subject go away...
well I went to an all boys school, until I was 13 when I discovered the joys of drug use, and effectively stopped going. One week end me and several friends were wandering around town when we stumbled a cross a house party and gate crashed it. Our Geography teacher was there (one of the only lady teachers). Her boyfriend was handing out 'hot-knives', that is, a way of smoking cannabis using a cooker, hot knives, and a bottle. Miss Bird was smoking up like there was no tomorrow. On the odd occasion that I did go back to school and Miss Bird would ask me why I hadn't done my homework, i would shout "hot-knives" just like her boyfriend had on that fateful knight

"If you want to do any drawings, help yourself to paper from the stock cupboard." Those fatal words mutated in my mind into "If you want to do any drawings - or make any paper aeroplanes..."

So me, Alex and Marco began raiding the cupboard, perfecting our individual designs, using playtime for test flights. Within days the first orders came in - "can you make one like that for me?" - and within a week the whole class (girls excepted) were in the grip of a craze.

The Sherlocks on the staff were quick to observe the increase in playtime air traffic, and the corresponding depletion of A4 in the stock cabinet. It was not long before the main suspects were hauled in.

So there we stood in the HM's office - me, Alex, Marco and a couple of associates in crime. You'd think we'd stolen the Crown Jewels or something. HM, red in the face, fuming and ranting: "What would you think if I were to help myself to school stock?". Silence... Then, with perfect timing, Alex lets go the loudest fart imaginable. The three of us stare at our feet, stare at the ceiling, at the office walls, our faces contorted, desperately trying to look serious, but absolutely crying with laughter.

Our Teacher had really lost all interest in teaching us Tecnical drawing. He sat up and laughed his socks off however, when, after 3 double periods of sticking and folding, 3 of us launched a quarter scale concord at him from the back of the class one Friday afternoon.

one day, our form tutor let the pgce student, who had applied for a job at our school, take the registration period. The entire class just ignored her and had a big paper aeroplane and crumpled up paper war, until the head walked past and looked through the window. We got a week of litter duty, and she was rejected for the job. I still feel bad about that. Getting litter duty, I mean.

in those boring history lesson we found it highly amusing to throw paper aeroplanes at fellow pupils with according abuse written all over them. for example the year 11 who was going out with a 14 year old fell victim to the 'cradle snatcher' express. funnily enough an even better story came of this when miss chatton kept the entire back row behind to find the said thrower, only this backfired and an 'im spartacus' scenario occured in which everyone admitted to it, leaving chatton baffled and letting everyone go scot free

in those boring history lesson we found it highly amusing to throw paper aeroplanes at fellow pupils with according abuse written all over them. for example the year 11 who was going out with a 14 year old fell victim to the 'cradle snatcher' express. funnily enough an even better story came of this when miss chatton kept the entire back row behind to find the said thrower, only this backfired and an 'im spartacus' scenario occured in which everyone admitted to it, leaving chatton baffled and letting everyone go scot free

We used to dip the aeroplane tip in ink or sprinkle the central wing area with itching powder. Also 'Capbangers' (tiny paper twists that explode on impact, taped to the plane nose caused endless mirth.

We came up with an innovative twist on the paper place. A paper dart with a drawing pin blu-tacked into the nose. These were obviously much more portable and concealable than paper planes and lobbing them at each other made us feel like twelve year old ninjas with throwing stars! Sadly the school could not ignore the evidence of hundreds of tiny holes appearing in the woodwork (and certain unfortunate pupils' knees) and had a proper clampdown, the rotters. Now if only I could remember how you made them...

How to make a teacher quit using paper airplanes: 1. Get the entire class to make a large arsenal of paper airplanes. 2. Announce a time when the entire class is to throw them continually until they run out of paper airplanes.
We did this, the teacher got so mad, he tried to storm out of the classroom, but couldn't open the door, walked straight into the door, broke his nose, started to cry and quit.

In prep, there was a great divide between those that could fold good paper aeroplanes (the double folded wings) and those that couldn't. Those of us that could use to fold them all recess long, and then spend lunch throwing them at those that couldn't. If we were feeling particularly cruel we would cover the tips in spit, snot, or mud and let loose.

Gordon Riot: 'decimate' means to reduce by a tenth, so did you just knacker 10% of them, or were you thinking of 'devastate' and so gave 'em all a right good seeing to?

Plastic craft knives? We used nail files. The size of the paper aeroplanes shrunk to become little more than dart flights. We used to fling these at eachother in a wood panelled room during lunch break. One earned far more credability points by whipping the incoming missiles from the air with a knotted scarf than by dodging, which was considered sissy.

In grade 7 our teacher was helping to a kid that had blood running down his face. Someone had managed to conjure a bee-sting. This is basiaclly a projectile piece of paper that was folded up very small so that the fold rested on a red-rubber-band perfectly, then a pin or needle was shoved into the tip.

funny.

the top stream of maths class was held upstairs, with us middle streamers in the room directly below it. the top streamers often liked to throw paper planes down out the windows for our amusement. this was all fine until someone threw a monster one, written on it 'mr leeds is gay' at the very moment mr leeds (our maths teacher) decided to look at the window...the next thing i knew, he had disappeared and there were unholy noises coming from upstairs...

In a particular enthralling chemistry lesson, we realised that filter paper circles could be folded inwards to make 4 winged aircraft of some kind. The problem was that they were too light and didn't fly well at all. Once we'd discovered that a small piece of blue tac (or chewingum gum for icky-ness) at the nose, with a drawing pin pushed through, made them fly perfectly, there came a 3 week period in which you could not walk down a corridor without being "nailed from behind".

Of course, this all ceased when someone threw one so hard, it smashed a beaker over a bunsen burner and caught fire, and we were all theatened with expulsion.