cling film
Not a proper or acceptable substitute for a lunchbox.
written by Jo* Blyt*, approved by Log

Or a contraceptive.
written by Ru*e *ickin*ton, approved by Log

The Cling Film Bomb
  1. Eat whole pack of refreshers.
  2. Retain in mouth.
  3. Empty into cligfilm.
  4. Twist tightly to form 'bomb'.
  5. Throw at someone's head.
  6. Fall around laughing.
  7. Go home for tea.
written by To* A*lewh*te, approved by Log

Apparently, you could put clingfilm over the toilet at a party, so that peoples' poo and wee went everywhere. Personally, I can't see that people wouldn't notice.
I preferred the old 'empty a bottle of washing up liquid into the cistern' trick, which was lush.
written by An*y Ma*sh, approved by Log

A less hygenic version of the washing up liquid was Top Decking. Simply drop your bowels into the cistern and voila; the host will be flushing stinky brown water down their toilet for weeks, if not years to come.
written by St*art*Laid*er, approved by Log

the only sensible use for clingfilm is to stretch it over your mouth and breathe in sharply, thus creating a pop that sounds nothing like gunfire; but when accompied by your friend pretending to fire from his gunshaped hand, can be quite realistic. Maybe.
written by Ni* Pete*s, approved by Log

When we commented on the sounds that Laura Burbela made in the toilets, she claimed that it was because she had dropped two pound coins in the bowl.
Now, none of us believed the pikey bint ever actually had 2 quid on her, but she kept up the act, even putting her hand down the loo, and trying to reach them. Of course, reaching into pissy water to touch her own shits was all we expected of her, so she didn't lose too much status.
This is the girl who - when I asked her why she walked like she'd shat herself - claimed she had shat herself. Forwhy? It kept her bum succulent.
Anyway, everyone knows the standard procedure for shitting in public; if you're going to shit with people listening, catch it on your toilet paper covered hand and lower it in to the loo carefully, so no one hears you. Remember to piss too, though, or they'll think you went in there to put in a tampon, which is sick.
Laura is welcome to come back at me with some awful revelation, if she's reading this. But she'd be lying. Because I was perfect. And dead popular.
Laura Burbela, the gloves are OFF - dish the shit on Kate S IMMEDIATELY - Log
written by Ka*e S, approved by Log