DIY Surgery
In year 8 CDT we had to design, make and 'market' a product of our choice. My group came up with the DIY Surgery Series.
The DIY Vasectomy Kit consisted of a razor blade to perform the operation with, a sewing kit to patch yourself up with (different colour threads available for the man about town), a can of premium strength lager as your anaesthetic, and an instruction manual.
The artwork was fairly good considering none of us could draw anything but knobs, which we were banned from drawing despite our pleas that it was vital to the project.
The kit proved to be quite popular, although the teacher confiscated the can of Stella so that we "wouldn't get caught with it." We later went on to design more DIY surgery kits for our own amusement and I actually gave the DIY Vasectomy kit to a friend at Christmas once.
The DIY Vasectomy Kit consisted of a razor blade to perform the operation with, a sewing kit to patch yourself up with (different colour threads available for the man about town), a can of premium strength lager as your anaesthetic, and an instruction manual.
The artwork was fairly good considering none of us could draw anything but knobs, which we were banned from drawing despite our pleas that it was vital to the project.
The kit proved to be quite popular, although the teacher confiscated the can of Stella so that we "wouldn't get caught with it." We later went on to design more DIY surgery kits for our own amusement and I actually gave the DIY Vasectomy kit to a friend at Christmas once.
written by Sc*tt L*itch, approved by Matt
In 6th form I bought a toy panda from the Nick Park 'Creature Comforts' animal range, made a 'Y' incision, took out the stuffing, made cuddly guts stuffed with the self-same fibres recently taken from its innards, and added a zip. This was then presented to my friend Beth at Christmas as the 'Psycho Panda Home Surgery Kit' (complete with illustrated instruction booklet), so named because of the mad staring glazed eyes it retained throughout the procedure.
Our brutality to soft toys did not end there. That same year we drew a huge pentagram on the common room table with tipp-ex and staked down a teddybear. We also sacrificed numerous hockey socks to our dark lord Marilyn Manson, though to be honest why he would want half a poorly knitted grubby item of girls sporting footwear is beyond me.
Our brutality to soft toys did not end there. That same year we drew a huge pentagram on the common room table with tipp-ex and staked down a teddybear. We also sacrificed numerous hockey socks to our dark lord Marilyn Manson, though to be honest why he would want half a poorly knitted grubby item of girls sporting footwear is beyond me.
written by He* Phi*lips, approved by Matt